18 months: 9 weeks, 5 days, 11 hours, 45mins and I am finally finished with my pumping journey, for this baby who knows what the future will bring.
Our journey began with a tongue tie, no latch, and supply issues. We released the tie and did all the exercises. Still, no latch. Then came postpartum depression. Through it all… I kept pumping because for me, I had no other choice (in my mind). Please know, this is my journey this time round, everyone’s experience is unique and whatever you need to do for you and your family is the best thing for you and your family. Never compare. You’re doing an amazing job! Feel free to skip my experience and jump to the tips at the bottom of this post. I hope at least one point can help you through this journey.
Our Journey
In the early days, it was every 2–3 hours — day and night — for months. I navigated blocked ducts (thanks to the wrong flange), low supply, ineffective pumps, medication, countless tears, and four long months of trying everything to make breastfeeding “work”.
And in the end, we never got a latch.
But I still breastfed.
I pumped and fed my baby — most of the time, every single feed. My beautiful lactation consultant, Felicity from @motherhoodmatters, once told me something I’ll never forget:
“Breastfeeding is a relationship between mum and baby.”
From that moment, I stopped measuring success by whether we latched and started focusing on connection. I began to see my breast as the source of his milk. To this day, he still finds comfort lying on my chest and snuggling close. We fed with the bottle just like we would’ve at the breast — and even now, he drinks this way and finds the same comfort.
So while we didn’t get a latch — which still hurts, if I’m honest — we built a beautiful breastfeeding relationship. And I’m proud of that.
Breastfeeding isn’t for everyone. And pumping? Definitely not for everyone. But what’s undeniable is that any amount of breastmilk is a gift. This journey mattered to me, and I surprised myself with how much resilience and grit I found along the way. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever pursued — and yes, I’m proud.
I couldn’t have done it without my best friend, husband and teammate Sven, the support of our family and friends, our brilliant medical team, and the pump that carried us through it all — @bubka.
To the exclusive pumping mums out there:
You are absolute rockstars. This sh*t is beyond hard — and at times, it feels near impossible. If you’re pumping because of latching issues, it can shatter you. It can make you feel broken or like you’ve failed.
But that voice in your head? It’s lying to you.
You are not broken. You’re not failing. You are powerful, strong, and doing something extraordinary.
I see you. I’m proud of you. And I’m with you. When you cry, I cry with you. When you celebrate, I celebrate with you. We’re in this together!
What I’ve Learnt from 18 Months of Exclusive Pumping:
- Not all lactation consultants are the same. Keep looking until you find one that’s the right fit (like a hairdresser — it’s personal!).
- Trust your gut. If something doesn’t feel right, don’t ignore it — even if multiple people tell you otherwise. Get more opinions.
- Postpartum is already hard. Be kind to yourself — you’re doing a mammoth job.
- Latching problems are not your fault. Your job is to make milk. Your baby’s job is to latch. If they can’t, get it checked early.
- Try different pumps. If one doesn’t feel right, try another. Cordless ones changed the game for me.
- Flanges matter!! Measure properly and get the right size.
- Middle of the night pumps are brutal. Keep yourself entertained — a show, a podcast, a good book. Make it you time. The oxytocin helps with milk supply!
- Let yourself cry. You’re not alone in this. There’s a whole tribe of us beside you.
- Blocked ducts = inflammation. Treat them like a sprained ankle — anti-inflammatories, icepacks, rest, and gentleness.
- Seal the pump properly. Leaks = heartbreak.
- You don’t need a freezer full of milk. Unless you’re planning to wean soon.
Most importantly:
- Pumping is breastfeeding. Your baby can still associate the process with warmth, comfort and you.
- Breastfeeding is a relationship. Whether you latch or pump, you can build deep connection with your baby.
- Be kind to yourself. This is next-level hard — and you’re doing it.
If you ever want to chat or just vent to someone who’s been through, reach out. I’m always here for a good vent.
Mel xx
